bits and pieces

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Maine-style Lobster Rolls

So good I forgot to photograph until halfway done :D
Can we be honest for a second?

Is there ANYTHING better than lobster? Really?

I thought not.

I wanted to do something nice for my life-partner-man as I have been sad and mopey the past couple days due to my ongoing inability to find a real job (note: 30 year olds with a decade of experience - PLEASE stop apply for entry level jobs. Clearly I need to work so that I may keep myself waist deep in lobster. I can't compete with your job experience, age, and willingness to work for peanuts. I need those jobs so I can avoid being you. Thank you). So - as I said, I wanted to do something nice for my bestie, and the only nice things I am able to do well involve cooking. I was also tired of having to make two separate meals - one with beef, one with not beef (for meee). Then I thought of lobster. What could possibly be a better way to say 'I love you and thank you for being the bestest' than a dead, dismembered sea-bug? Nothing, thought I!

Then I got to the grocery store. At first I was enamoured of my local grocer. Well it had President's Choice and romance novels. So I was happy. However, I have fallen out of love with it due to the quality of the produce and protein. The meat just scares me. Even if it has a 30% off sticker on it, beef should never be so grey it's green. Just no. I honestly don't know how they can sell that. Also - discount meat? Hmm. That seems like something I'd be OK paying the extra 2$ to avoid. The produce isn't BAD, it's just hit or miss.. and when you're running a grocery store, I feel like your fruits and vegetables should probably be decent. Do you hear me Galen?? SAVE MY STORE!

Right. So. Off my future 2nd husband Galen Weston. The lobster - now I'd normally go to the local fish mongerer for lobby lobster but this was an impulse decision and time my enemy. Getting a look at these sad frozen lobster tails didn't exactly inspire me. To avoid serving sub-par lobster I figured I'd serve it another way (vs. just grilled with drawn butter). Since my local grocer also lacks the supplies to make sushi or fresh rolls and I didn't feel like lobster bisque, lobster rolls were an obvious conclusion. However - I had never made lobster rolls before NOR had I ever steamed a lobster. I didn't even know if you COULD steam a lobster tail (you can).

These were SUPER good. Delicious, lobster-y, creamy, and filling. Somehow (luck of the irish) I ended up with the right lobster-mayo-crunch-bread ratio and everything worked perfectly. I probably could have eaten two but I ran out of lobster as it was, so c'est la vie. This is easy, fun, impressive, and delicious. Pretty much everything you'd want in a no-fuss dinner/left-over-lobster-lunch (but really - who has left over lobster?).

2 lobster tails frozen/fresh (just obviously thaw if they're frozen)
2 rolls (I used left over hot-dawwwg buns although I'm sure there's a superior roll out there)
2 tbsp of butter or so (for your rolls)

3-4 tbsp mayo (I used Hellman's)
1 green onion/scallion finely chopped
1/2 a celery stalk finely diced
1.5 tsp lime juice
a squirt of lemon juice
a dash of salt
a dash of pepper
a few dashes of Old Bay Seasoning (the best)
a dash or two of tabasco (doesn't add heat just a nice little ZIP!)

some chopped iceberg lettuce. Not ALL lobster rolls come with lettuce, so I was hesitant but I really liked the crunch and the freshness the lettuce added. Two thumbs/claws up. 

 for poaching/steaming your lobster:
2 cups of salted water
1 big tbsp of butter
1 tsp of old bay
a squirt of lemon juice
a big splash of white wine

other things you will need: 
a big sauce pot
a frying pan for toasting your bread
  1. This is pretty easy. Bring a pot of salted water to a boil. Throw in your Old Bay, butter, lemon, white wine. There should be about 1 - 2 inches of water in this pot. Once it's boiling throw in your lobster tails and cover. Cook for 7-8 minutes. Remove from pot and throw in a bowl of cold water/run under cold water. Leave them there. 
  2. Mix your mayo, tabasco, lemon, Old Bay, salt, pepper and lime. You will get a tasty liquidy mayo mess. Appetizing! Add chopped celery and onion. Stick it in the fridge until you need it. 
  3. Get a frying pan. Heat on medium high with 2 tbsp of butter. Once the butter is melted, spread your rolls on the frying pan and swoosh them around (face down) to ensure they get as much butter as possible. Leave them facedown for a few minutes (check them occasionally) until they start to get golden and brown and toasted and wonderful. Remove them from the pan once they're done. 
  4. While your buns are toasting cut your lobster tails open and remove the meat. Dice it into nice sized chunks (about 1/2 inch pieces or so - you want big bites of lobster, not weird mush). Combine it with your mayo mixture. 
  5. Once your buns are out, add a handful of chopped iceberg, top with your lobster mix and EAT. 

This was very easy and surprisingly fast to make. And by the glory of Poseidon was it GOOD.  You don't have to use lobster tails - you can use whole lobsters + the body and claw meat. I just only had access to the lobster tails. A fun thing I learned was that steaming the lobster was a really easy and reallllllly tasty way of preparing lobster. I know most people are probably sitting there going 'Yes, duh, moron girl, steamed lobster, obviously, where are you from?'. WELL I'M IN SASKATCHEWAN SO LEAVE ME ALONE. Or come visit! That would be nice! But yup, steaming your lobster in a broth of butter-wine-old bay goodness seems to be the way to go.

Like everything else I post (apparently) this was MAGNIFIQUE, so easy, sooo simple, and SO good. It was filling, heavenly, rich and tasty but not HEAVY. A wonderful light(ish) dinner for a lovely spring evening.

Sorry little lobsters, RIP.


  1. uh holy crap why haven't I thought of this yet, I WANT TO VISIT YOU IN MANSKATCHEWAN. Do you know how intrigued I am by that province? It seems like no-one. ever. leaves.

  2. it is eerily seductive.. everyone actually is SO nice. Suspiciously nice. Strangers say good morning to me and I give them confused looks. I feel like a New Yorker or something. PLUS you come here expecting SASKACHEWAN, and it's actually kind of lovely so you're doubly impressed. Then you meet the boys who grow real tall and polite out here. They hold open doors for you, pull out chairs....

    then suddenly you're living here.

    Plus they have lobster n' stuff so really, what else could you need?